Lions and Tigers and Bears. Oh My!

From The Wizard of Oz, of course. 

Apparently, the words are meant to express awe and apprehension regarding the presence, combination or abundance of three particular things.

So, how about Splinters, Zits and Whiteheads. Oh My!.

They, too, express awe and apprehension and they all scream for extraction.

Splinters are easy.  A sharp needle, alcohol for sterilizing, a magnifying glass and Voila!   Done and dusted!

Zits cry out for a good squeeze. Ideally a little gunk will pop right out and all will be well.  Just like that!

Then then are those whiteheads!   They’re a little more challenging.   And, from my perspective, a lot more fun.

Imagine my pleasure when I saw not one, but two whiteheads on my face recently.  I’d just been to the dermatologist for a skin-check and she gave them a name which was alien but I knew what they were and what I needed to do.  Fond memories of adolescence were wafting in the air.

I waited a day or two with the hope/possibility that they’d fatten up a bit.  The Fourth of July seemed an apt day to “operate.”  Bombs bursting in air so forth.  With needle, alcohol and my reading glasses in hand, I went to the mirror.

Now, imagine my despair when I found that they had disappeared.  They simply weren’t there.  All gone.  But not by my hand. Age did that.  They didn’t have the oils necessary for survival and growth.  They dried up and went away.  All by themselves. 

I am momentarily bereft.  I accept your sympathy but it really doesn’t ease the disappointment. Perhaps a good Samaritan will proffer and splinter or two to bring a sliver of joy into my life.  That would be “awe”some.